The thing about decisions…
A fresh perspective on how to make effective decisions
How often have you had to make big decisions and found yourself stuck, mind clouded, unable to move the wheel of your life until that big block is out of the way!
Well, you're not alone. Decision-making is complex and tiring. It takes a toll on our well-being and occupies lots of space in our minds-especially big decisions with significant consequences. That is why it is crucial to have another perspective on decisions and the decision-making process to move quickly from that "stuck- transient stage" to a freer and happier state of mind and well-being—regaining your flow state as soon as possible.
It is essential to realize that indecision is a decision within itself. It's a decision not to do anything. While sometimes "nothing" is exactly what we need to do, this may be counter-productive at other times, especially when it keeps one crippled in that stuck stage. Indecision is effective only coming from a clear awareness of perspectives and an empowered position of resonant choice.
A variation is the consequence of the big decision, which renders all other decisions without choice. It's as if we gave up the power for any more choices when we made "the Big Choice". Now we have to live with the consequences. The reality is we do not "have to"; we can always make new choices that serve us better.
Another Perspective
First, we must understand that decisions are not inherently "right" or "wrong." Rather, they are affirmative calls of action to take the necessary steps and little moves towards the needed direction. What direction is that? The one that puts you in the environment you desire. The truth, your north.
Second, checking that the decision flows from your intuition is vital. Both the mind and heart must be at peace with this. One way is to check if the decision's intentions resonate with your values, mission, and life purpose. If those tools are unclear to you, life coaching could help identify those effectively in a creative, thought-provoking process and in a supportive, safe, and courageous environment. Coaching helps us remember that while we may not be able to choose our circumstances, we can powerfully choose the experience and the story we create. We can connect to our inner wisdom, which empowers us to look at our circumstances from many points of view and consciously choose the perspective that will carry us forward with presence, power, and purpose. This perspective creates a more fulfilling life, better balance, and a more effective life process.
A decision enables you to move. Movement creates momentum. Momentum is dynamic. In decision-making, being dynamic is better than being static. This is evident in the relief you feel when the decision has been made and is over-with. Next? Execution.
Execution
It is essential to start executing the decision swiftly. If it is too big to manage all at once, splitting it into small, timed steps may help. "Start by doing what's necessary, then do what's possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible." - - St. Francis of Assisi. Remember to keep the momentum going and not step back from execution to the decision stage. The only exception is if the circumstances and reasoning for making that decision have changed. Decision-making is a dynamic process, and decisions made are not handcuffs. Flexibility in re-deciding, if necessary, is vital.
“Start by doing what's necessary, then do what's possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible” —St. Francis of Assisi
An important note here is to keep our emotions aside while executing. Naturally, our inner self critics may creep in and try to protect us out of fear of change or unexpected outcomes. They may question the rationale behind the decision to pull us back to safety. Be aware of these common traps and little voices inside your head and have a firm attitude that you have already decided and moved on now.
The Aftermath
There are consequences to every decision, and they may not come to be as expected. Even when you are confident you are making the right decision, the experience and the outcome may not work out the way you hoped. Remember that you cannot control external events; you can only control how we view them—acknowledging this is important.
nderstand that with every decision, you are working with probabilities and variables of things that may change, changing the whole experience. It's life's nature; whatever you do will be imperfect.
If self-blame, self-doubt, and self-criticism become frequent uncalled-for mind visitors, then remind yourself why you took that decision in the first place. What was the situation right then? Did the circumstances change between the time of making the decision and now? If the answers were yes, then voila, the consequences were out of control, and it is just what it is. Accept the consequences as out of your control, carry on anyway, and be kind to yourself. Practicing active self-compassion and equanimity through meditation does magic here. You could also tap into your support structure by engaging your coach, trusted friends and family members in this process.
Decisions are part of life. The more aware we are of the decision-making process and the emotions involved, the better we get at making effective decisions. Ones that enable the right conditions to take place. Ones that put you in the right environment of whatever you want to be or attract to your life. Ones that bring you closer to achieving your vision. Make decisions with intentions. Be vulnerable and open to the many possibilities waiting to show up. Magical things will happen then. Just trust the process. It's life's promise.
Ahmad Jamous
Life Coach, Leadership & Business Consultant